A Twisted Crown of Thorns ®

Reformed. Christianity. Evangelism. Modern Culture.

Tag Archives: hermeneutics

How to Narcigete Any Bible Story In 4 Easy (Wrong) Steps

Chris Rosebrough has an interesting article on Bible reading and misinterpretation of the text. I must confess I used to apply this technique to twist Scripture and I see many pastors resort to using it with motivational speaking, Prosperity “gospel” and Word of Faith teachings. It is very faulty and man centred and I am glad to condemn it today. You see…


There is an epidemic of Narcissistic Eisegesis a.k.a. Narcigesis, infecting the churches in America today. Pastors and Bible teachers have mastered the art of allegorizing all of the characters and details of every Bible story in order to make the stories about YOU. Therefore, I’ve decided to give a little ‘how to’ advice regarding this Bible twisting technique in the hopes that by doing so you’ll see the obvious problems with this way of approaching the Biblical texts. So here we go.

How to Narcigete Any Bible Story In 4 Easy Steps
Primary Assumption: Every Bible story is about YOU. And, since YOU struggle with setbacks, problems and challenges that keep YOU from achieving YOUR maximal greatness that means that the Bible is really all about giving YOU a road map that YOU can follow to achieve YOUR dreams and god-given destiny.

Step 1
Read a Bible Story.

Step 2
Identify the hero and the villain(s) in the story.

Step 3
Identify yourself with the hero (who also happens to be on a journey toward greatness and achieving his god-given destiny, just like you).

Read more of this post


What does that Bible verse mean to you?

You have probably heard that question before. Brace yourself…

Avoid superficial interpretation. One of the common problems in interpreting the Bible is this little phrase, “This verse means to me….” so forth and so forth and so forth. Let me tell you something. It doesn’t matter what it means to you, the question is what would it mean if you weren’t alive? What would it mean if you didn’t exist? What does it mean PERIOD is the issue, not what does it mean to you. Sometimes you’ll hear people get together and supposedly have a Bible study which is little-more than a pooling of ignorance. People say, “Well, I look at this verse and I feel this verse is saying…
It doesn’t matter what you feel. That has nothing to do with it.
It’s not a matter of how you feel about the verse, it’s not a matter of what you think it means to you. Avoid ad-libbing in Bible interpretation. …Read More!

What is the most misapplied verse in the bible?

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Phil 4:13) Each time I hear some body quote this verse it always seems out of context. It’s like saying this leopard too (see picture) was believing that verse when it saw (er) … food.

Every verse in the bible should always be read in context. Yup even:

I alone know the plans I have for you, plans to bring you prosperity and not disaster, plans to bring about the future you hope for. (Jer 29:11)

I hope that prosperity televangelist gets to read this. Context. Context. Context. 😉 …Read More!

Sister Martha Discovers Bible Chapter on Christian Liberty

I still remember the day sister Martha came for Sunday service in style. She had just started reading her bible that month and there was a twinkle in her eyes.

She said she had also been meditating on Paul’s advice to Timothy:

No longer drink only water, but use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments. 1 Tim 5:23

I must add Martha was a literalist. She also has several ailments. …Read More!

Read this before attending a snake handling church service.

One very good piece of advice would be to avoid a snake handing church service. But most people love impromptu adventure and will scale Mount Everest just to place chewing gum on the top of the mountain –  because the bible verse for the day (which just happened to be John 13:27) said  ‘what you are about to do, do it fast’. So…

How do you know if you have inadvertently wandered into a snake handling church? For one thing, every single congregation has several members who are badly maimed or disfigured. In the 40 US churches there have been over 100 fatalities. But if that doesn’t tip you off: If the greeter at the door looks genuinely surprised that you’ve come to visit; or if they ask for the offering in cash, check, or mouse. …Read More!

The Ever Changing Hermeneutics of The “Stop” Sign.

It seems I am the last one to always discover interesting bits on the net. Like this one…a little parable about hermeueutics, the art of interpretation (especially biblical interpretation), applied to a “Stop” sign:

Moroccan Stop Sign

1. A postmodernist deconstructs the sign by knocking it over with his car, and thus ends the tyranny of the north-south traffic over the east-west traffic.

2. The Marxist refuses to stop because she sees the stop sign as an instrument of class conflict, since the bourgeois use the north-south route and obstruct the proletariat moving east-west.

3. A serious and educated Catholic rolls through the intersection because he believes he cannot understand the stop sign apart from its interpretive community and tradition. Observing that the interpretive community doesn’t take it too seriously, he doesn’t feel obligated to take it too seriously either.

4. Average Catholics and mainline denominationalists don’t bother to read the sign but will stop if the car in front does. …There’s More!