Some people believe there should be a state of ceremonial purity when touching a holy book. A man or woman must take a ritual shower or bath to attain a heightened level of righteousness before he even glimpses into the written mind of God as it were. Christians on the other hand come in two categories. Those who love their bibles and those who really love their bibles. Today I will dwell on the eccentric latter.
“A bible that’s falling apart usually belongs to someone who isn’t.” -Charles Spurgeon
They are called Bible markers! Are you one of them? Do not pretend you have never even heard of them. You have seen their bibles. Battered, tattered, high lighted and underlined from Genesis to Revelation (Yup, even through the book of Obadiah too). Different colors of highlights, areas underlined in different colors, circled, bracketed and notes to the side.
In a bid to stamp out this depraved practice, here is my recommendation. These deviants should be kicked out of church (like the seven sons of Sceva!) Their Bibles should be routinely checked before and after every Sunday Service, Bible study (and even before bed time) for any smudges and ink indiscretions. Why can’t they just simply learn to be smart like those nice environmentally green Christians who carry iPad bibles? Better still why don’t they just leave their Bibles at home or something. Ugh!
Do I mark my Bible? Uh, what kind of question is that? I will not even dignify that question with an answer. Preposterous. Presumptuous. As one wise Libyan man rhetorically once asked, ‘What did I do to you? Do you know right from wrong?’
Wait a minute, where is my marker?
[Photo HT to Kathy via Facebook ]
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What’s with the disgusting video following the post?
Sorry which video?
I can’t find a disgusting video. Only YouTube clips. Great idea by the way. I hadn’t noticed it. I would consider deleting his post and the replies, including this one if you’d like.
Jeff
Well, who’s Bible is that?
Jeff
I know you envy the owner. Got it on Facebook.
I thought it was yours. Then I could really call you a hypocrite. (smiley here) So it’s somebody I know? You’re going to leave me in the dark?
Jeff
And of course I know it’s all in fun.
Love this! Damn those people who actually read and study the Bible! 😉
What is the name of the owner, if you don’t mind me asking? I’m really just curious.
I’m quite curious too because I’ve seen it recently popping up on my fb but the post wasn’t from that long ago.