A Twisted Crown of Thorns ®

Reformed. Christianity. Evangelism. Modern Culture.

Tag Archives: how to start mega church

6 Guaranteed Methods for Starting a “Mega -Church” or Get Your Money Back!

Well, well, well. I would have loved to have come up with these patented methods but some body beat me to them. But I was close though. 😉 So, do you….

Image is everything...Try 3-D!

Want to be in a Mega-Church? Want to start one? Want to know how to function like a Mega-Church? Here are 666 ways. (Ooops my 6 key stuck, sorry, I meant: 6 ways.)

1. Insist on a lack of specificity. Can we be honest here? The more specific you are with doctrine, the more detailed your statement of faith – the more likely you will make some uncomfortable or confused. Solution? Be very VERY general. For instance, under “Beliefs” use a small list. Maybe four items. (1) We believe in God (2) We love Jesus (3) People are important (4) We have no expectations. Now I ask you, how can you lose with that? That would barely offend an ACLU lawyer.

2. Sing a LOT of songs and have talented, professional quality musicians and singers. Sing a LOT of songs. Don’t sing the old dirge hymns, sing things that are peppy and fast. Sing a LOT of songs. Don’t emphasize doctrinal content like the old hymns, make the songs subjective. …Read More!